Every time I give a downsizing presentation, I open with the same question. I ask the audience to imagine they’re leaving San Diego next week — and they can only take what they truly want. Then I ask: do you believe your family would want your belongings?
I ask them to raise their hand if the answer is yes.
You know how many hands I typically see? Almost none. Maybe one.
And then I say it out loud: you just admitted your own family doesn’t want your belongings — but you want to do an estate sale believing that strangers will?
This almost always draws a laugh and it softens the blow of the reality that passing belongings down doesn’t happen the way it used to.
The Estate Sale Myth
There’s a persistent belief that an estate sale is the answer to a lifetime of accumulated belongings. It sounds logical enough: hire a company, price everything, open the doors, and walk away with a check. Clean slate, easy money.
But here’s the reality I’ve seen over and over again in San Diego: the resale market for household goods is simply not strong enough to make estate sales worthwhile for most people — especially after you factor in the company’s commission (typically 35–50% of gross sales).
Often, the part that people don’t take into account is that there is a cost for the time spent by the estate sale company to prep and hold the estate sale. Their contract usually has a reserve amount that must be paid before you earn anything.
Why Silver Linings Transitions Takes a Different Approach
This is exactly why we don’t offer estate sales as part of our services. It’s not an oversight — it’s a deliberate choice rooted in what we’ve seen actually serves our clients best.
This is where our beloved Christine Bowman comes in. Interestingly, I met her before Covid doing an estate sale for a mutual client. When the estate sale industry started declining, she joined our team and now works as our “estate sale consultant”.
With her more than 30 years of experience, she can identify what items hold value and in these cases, she pulls these items out and brokers the sale for our clients – this has included a $100,000 first edition book, a $15,000 piece of art and so much more.
With a “rolodex” of over 30 years, she has buyers for just about every category – from silver to Christmas.
If we can’t get the items sold, we reach out to third party buy out companies who will assess the value of what remains in the home, factor their labor cost and make an offer to our clients to clear the home. Often, our clients make money but sometimes the labor to clear exceeds the value of what remains. And because we work with multiple buy out companies, Christine also understands which company is likely to make the best offer based on what remains.
Most of these buy out companies will resell items at swap meets, in consignment stores. Anything that can’t be sold is donated – either to local charities or if not wanted by local charities, items can be taken to Tijuana.
We do our best to keep items out of landfills which costs additional money for dump fees and goes against our company’s values of making moves environmentally friendly.
When someone is downsizing, going through a major life transition, or settling a loved one’s estate, they’re already navigating something emotionally complex. Our job isn’t to add another layer of disappointment on top of that. It’s to help our clients keep as much money as possible and make sure their lifetime of belongings ends up in the hands of someone who will appreciate having them.
If you are holding onto items because you believe they hold value, you can research this on your own by using Google Lens and taking a picture of the item to get an idea of the value or by going onto eBay to see what other similar items have sold for.
Here are a few other ways you can downsize:
- Gifting items to family with intention have those conversations about what has significance and choose only a few so you are more likely to get a “yes”
- Donating to organizations that will put items to genuine use — there are wonderful local nonprofits that truly need what most households have in abundance. Visit our site to see a list.
- Buy Nothing groups and community sharing — incredibly satisfying, and items go directly to neighbors who actually want them
- Consignment for select pieces — for furniture or art that has a real market, consignment can be a much better fit than the estate sale environment. In San Diego – Asian decor and Mid Century Modern are still selling
- Vintage Clothing – kids are into “thrifting” or even purchasing vintage clothing on sites like Depop.
Your Belongings Deserve a Better Plan
I’m not saying estate sales are never the right fit — there are situations where they make sense, and there are good estate sale companies out there doing quality work. But in my experience with San Diego clients, they’re often chosen by default rather than by design. People assume it’s the obvious solution without ever asking whether it’s actually the best one.
That’s what we’re here to help you figure out.
If you’re staring down a home full of belongings — yours or a loved one’s — and wondering where to even start, let’s talk. We’ll help you ask the right questions, make a plan that actually works, and find homes for things that deserve more than a price sticker on a Saturday morning.
Silver Linings Transitions is a San Diego-based move management and downsizing company. We are an A+ Accredited Member of the National Association of Senior Move Managers (NASMM) and are here to help individuals and families navigate life’s biggest transitions with care, clarity, and a lot less stuff.